Lesson 21 of 30: When You Refuse to Be Muzzled, Expect Resistance

For a long time, I thought narcissism was simply a personality flaw. Something psychological. Something rooted in ego, insecurity, or trauma. And while all of those can be true, I’ve learned that there is often something deeper at work. The battle is not against flesh and blood. There is an enemy unseen.

Scripture tells us plainly,

“For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.” — Ephesians 6:12.

Narcissism, at its core, is often a manifestation of the Jezebel spirit working alongside its counterpart, the Ahab spirit. I break down Jezebel in Lesson 19 of 30, however, let's explore her briefly here. Jezebel seeks control, domination, manipulation, and image management. Ahab abdicates responsibility, avoids confrontation, and enables dysfunction through passivity. Together, they create a system where control thrives and accountability dies.

This is why narcissism feels so disorienting to encounter. You are not just dealing with selfishness. You are dealing with a spirit that twists truth, rewrites narratives, gaslights reality, and punishes discernment. Jezebel manipulates through accusation and charm. Ahab protects the system by remaining silent.

And here is the hard truth. These spirits do not only operate in romantic relationships. They operate in families, churches, ministries, workplaces, and friendships. Anywhere authority is misused and truth is suppressed, these spirits find room to operate.

Jezebel does not always seduce sexually. That is one of the greatest misconceptions. Seduction is a tactic, not the root. The root is control. Control over perception. Control over people. Control over outcomes. Control over narrative. When control is threatened, Jezebel attacks. When truth confronts dysfunction, Jezebel accuses.

Ahab’s role is just as dangerous. Ahab enables harm by refusing to lead. By refusing to protect. By refusing to confront. By choosing comfort over righteousness. This is why systems infected by these spirits feel suffocating. Nothing is ever resolved. Truth is punished. And those who see clearly are labeled as the problem.

But we must be careful. The enemy’s greatest strategy is to make us fight people instead of discerning spirits. People are not the enemy. They are often victims of influence, trauma, and deception themselves. That does not mean abuse should be tolerated. It means discernment must be paired with wisdom, boundaries, and prayer.

I have also learned that this spirit seeks to silence women who speak with clarity and conviction. When control fails, accusation follows. Every time I spoke up about truth, boundaries, or discernment, the attack intensified. The goal was not correction, it was muzzling. But I’ve learned that knowing who I am in Christ is the foundation that keeps me standing. Identity is what Jezebel cannot penetrate. When you are rooted in who God says you are, accusation loses its power, intimidation falls flat, and manipulation is exposed for what it is.

When you encounter narcissistic behavior, the call is not to diagnose the person, but to discern the spirit. Ask God for wisdom. Ask Him how to respond, when to speak, and when to step back. Not every battle is meant to be fought head-on. Some are won through distance, truth, and light.

“Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” — James 4:7

Resistance begins with submission. Submission to truth. Submission to God. Submission to discernment from the Holy Spirit instead of emotion. And that discernment is not judgment rooted in fear as explored in Lesson 20, but wisdom rooted in love.

Conclusion

For my 30’s, I am learning that clarity is a gift. Discernment is protection. And not every conflict is personal. Sometimes it is spiritual. When I stop wrestling people and start discerning spirits, peace returns, authority is restored, and confusion loses its power.

Now that you know, let’s grow,

– Kimrose🌹